SkyeWint's audio Reviews on Newgrounds

[J@K's Main Jam (Original)]

Hello. Well, since you asked for a review, I may as well give one, even though I don't have as much spare time as I'd like.

Unfortunately, after listening to just part of it, I think you're going to dislike me for this review, because there's a LOT that I'm going to be poking and prodding.

THE GOOD:
-This has a lot of interesting concepts, and it definitely isn't a normal song. I like how the intro is ambient, and how the drums seem to have a light phaser on them.
-The drums, once they actually get into a cohesive beat at 3:17, are pretty darn good until about 6:25. They're good again at 7:34, until 12:54

THE NOT-AS-GOOD:
-I am fairly sure that the song's intro lasts for... about 3 minutes and 17 seconds long. That's what it seems like at least, because that's when the drums actually become cohesive. This time is just a little bit *too much*.
-The recording quality varies wildly, and the drums seem to flicker in and out from being in the background to being in the foreground.
-A lot of the instruments seem to not fit together because their own individual tempos are changing slightly - that is, in the sections when they do fit together pretty well. Otherwise, the instruments seem to be playing in their own whole time signatures, not playing particularly together.
-There are some areas where the harmonics don't fit together too well - the bass and the guitar clash. I apologize, I'm not going to listen through and list each of them. But I will say that there are several around the ten minute mark and one right after the 'intro' at around 3:30.
-The overall mixing of this could be improved quite a bit - the mix is rather 'thin' without something doing chords. There was a rather 'watery' sound at around 11:12 which could be fixed. While there isn't much mixing distortion, there's a little bit, and it could be removed fairly easily. Also, as I said, sometimes the drum volume flickers in and out.
-The vocals aren't the highest quality, and... I'm sorry to whoever did them, but the voice itself isn't extremely well-done - I'd suggest having a similar-sounding synth in place of it.
-What's the theme? The whole thing seems like one long improv session. I'd also suggest practicing *a little* once the full song has been made, planned, and decided on. Writing it out could help with this. I admit, it's a tedious process, but it will make the whole thing sound a LOT better and cleaner once done.
-No outro? Curses.

Overall: Some good ideas, but the poor execution and recording quality made it much worse than what it could have been. I apologize for having to be so harsh, but... hopefully it'll help.

Good luck.

-Review Request Club-
-Swint-

gamejunkie responds:

Did you even read the Authors Comments? This was recorded over 30 years ago. No mixing, just a Live recording. As for practicing, the guys that were responsible for making this track have been playing for twice as long as you are old. And are now or have been in some of Australias best bands, including the lead singer. I have no problem with you being harsh but seriously a 3, you've got to be kidding!

Thanks anyway.

[Just lay it down]

Hey man! I hear you want a review! It's been awhile, hasn't it. I certainly remember you from before - remember me?

Anyway. Can't get too off into that - you need some feedback.

THE GOOD:
-The mixing on this is a lot better than your old songs.
-I like the samples and SFX you have throughout the song, they work really well.
-Your drum loops aren't repetitive at all - they vary MORE than enough throughout the song.
-The sections of this are really cool, I particularly like the more chill breakdown at 1:47 with the electric piano and the little glitchy drums.
-You've improved a lot. Just hearing how much you've improved since before is great. ;)

THE NOT-AS-GOOD:
-The horn samples initially seem to cut off a little bit too much at the end - I feel like they should have just a little bit of reverb to transition into the next chord rather than completely stopping before the next one.
-I think you could stand to have the chord progression change a little bit more, or transition into a second section. While I'm aware that this is hip-hop, it could still stand to have at least a B section for chords.
-I don't quite see the 'chorus' of this. There are three distinct sections, but what's the main 'tune' other than that staccato string tune? Would be nice to have more than just chords.
-At about 2:30, it starts getting noticeably repetitive. It also just seems a bit 'much', particularly since it doesn't change at all until it fades out to the end.
-...THE OUTRO. IS. A. FADEOUT. D: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-

Overall:
Ok, honestly. This is really cool, I like it. Could use a bit more of a tune, gets a *little* too loud at times (2:30 to 3:13, I'm looking at you), but still. It's great. I like it.

Hopefully this was helpful, man!

-Review Request Club-
-Swint-

ESTAR48 responds:

Of course i remember you! Thanks for this awsome review! Im totally agree with you, ill put lyrics to hte song later on, so note that ITS NOT FINISHED YET. I like that you see my skills now, i love music, is my life!!! Again, thanks for your review, i really appreciate that YOU review my songs, thanks!!!

[The Dying]

Hmm, a house song. Ok, let's see this!

The good:
-Very well-mixed.
-Cool chording.
-Very nice melodies.
-Whoah. Awesome "explosion" at 1:45, where'd you get that/how'd you make it?

The not-so-good:
-I've heard that rhythm with plucks that you've used so many times that it's stock - perhaps try something a little different?
-Some of the chords seem to blend into each other, causing a little bit of phasing that doesn't quite work and seems dissonant, which isn't good considering the nature of the song. This occurs at 0:37-0:46 initially.
-1:15 is a little bit late to introduce the melody, even for a house song.
-There simply isn't enough variation - there's only one real chord pattern, and it gets old pretty fast. There is also only one rhythm, which as I said, is pretty much stock for techno/house/dance songs at this point.
-NO OUTRO. WHYYYYYYYYYYY? D:
-I don't hear any bass-basslines. The pluck could be the bassline, I suppose, but there's nothing below that, and it's fairly mid-ranged (granted, it does have one sub-bass).
-You might want to try out some other kinds of synths, all of these sound pretty much the same.

Ok, overall. I think you need (A) more variation in chords, rhythms, and melodies, and (B) to spend more than 1 day on making a song. I'd spend more like, a week on a song to make sure it's as perfect as I can get it - unless I have fewer instruments and a REALLY good idea of what I want to do already in mind.

-Review Request Club-
-Swint-

[Locked Up]

Alright. You actually recorded this? Cool. Could be a bit better though...

The good:
-You have some cool ideas with this.
-The ending is also fairly cool.

The not-so-good: Ok, sorry, going to have to be a bit mean here.
-The mixing and recording quality is very low - I'd suggest using a DAW of some kind and using that to sequence your tune, as well as using a better microphone and recording area so there's not so much background noise.
-The introduction seems to be in a different key than the guitar, causing a bit of disconnection.
-There is no bass, except in the beginning - and even that is fairly quiet and difficult to detect.

Main ways to improve this:
-Get something to sequence and mix this in.
-Use a better microphone or make solely on the computer for higher quality.

I really don't have much more I can comment on, the extremely poor mixing and recording quality is mainly what brings this down - if you get that down, I'll comment more on the song itself.

-Review Request Club-

[Roma [Int.]]

Alright, since this is a sectioned piece... SECTIONED REVIEW TIME! Yaaaaaay. Confetti and all that. Anyway. On to the review!

Movement 1 - THE GOOD:
-I love the theme, very glad that this section has a more thematic idea tying it together - it keeps me from getting bored or feeling as disconnected as your other song I had reviewed did.
-While the end is not part of the theme, it works quite well for the "story" feel, and the dissonance in the strings really drives the feel of that part home.
-Nice use of a light timpani in the end of the section. It filled out a part of the mix that most people don't use.

Movement 1 - THE NOT-AS-GOOD:
-I was a bit confused - you had said the section ends joyfully, but it doesn't quite end in the way I was expecting. While it ends in a major chord, I was expecting something a little more... 'completing'. That might not have been the best word, but I feel like there should have been a little bit more of a tune there to truly 'finish' the section. Other than this, I have no criticism of this section.

Movement 2 - THE GOOD:
-I very much like the high strings with the low strings - leaving out strings in the mid section creates an interesting atmosphere, particularly with the harp to balance it out.
-I love that light percussion used in there.
-The dissonance is once again quite fitting and well-done.
-Wonderful transition at 3:00-3:06. Wonderful.

Movement 2 - THE NOT-AS-GOOD:
-The theme isn't quite as prevalent in this movement as in the previous one, and is a bit difficult to decipher, it mainly seems to be wandering (you know what I'm talking about, I mentioned this in the other review as 'rambling' - need to use vocabulary :D) and disconnected in the middle - though part of it does make a reappearance, which is good.
-I notice an odd buzzing sound from about 1:52 to the end of 1:56. Don't know what's causing it, but it doesn't quite work with the orchestral-ness of the rest of the song - though it is in tune, ironically.
-As JosephAS1 said, the strings at about 2:06 just randomly end, which sounds quite surprising and doesn't *quite* fit, though it isn't overly bad. Fading out a little bit more would be nice - that or a reverb'd end.
-Toward the end of this section, right after the transition I commented on, the background for the theme of Cacus seems to not be overly well-done. I'm not sure how you would improve this though, and it could just be a little personal nitpick - feel free to ignore this if you think it doesn't apply overly well.
-Also toward the end of this section, I think it could really, really use a stronger percussion section - after all, it's depicting a battle. If you don't like putting strong percussion in with the other instruments, then perhaps a percussion solo?

Movement 3 - THE GOOD:
-While there's not too much to this section, it certainly fits exactly what you said.
-I love the choir sound in the middle of this section.

Movement 3 - THE NOT-AS-GOOD:
-I think the choir, while sounding awesome, could really use a bit more to do - choirs can sing more than large notes, after all.
-The bass percussion rumbling in the middle with the choir makes it difficult to hear the staccato bass strings.
-This section is, well, too short. It's really good for its length, but could definitely stand to be extended!

Overall song - THE GOOD:
-Wonderful melodies, very fitting for the story (or stories, whatever) that you were painting with the music.
-The dissonance is extremely well-done and is also quite fitting.

Overall song - THE NOT-AS-GOOD:
-Generally the same things as in your other song, the themes aren't very well-developed and could stand to have a lot more buildup to them.
-The sections are a bit too short sometimes, and don't have the best endings they could have.
-A few little program errors, I'd guess, as well as issues with fadeouts.
-Need more percussion in some sections.

But still. This is awesome, and much better than a lot of what I see on new grounds. Good work!

...and I just about filled the character limit - only 5 characters left. :D

-Swint-

samulis responds:

Thanks again for writing such an excellent review, I will be sure to return the favor when I have some time. :)

The little audio glitch with the buzz is something I have been trying to get rid of for a while. It only is added in the final rendering of the song and seems to be caused by sustained notes on either the violin harmonics or contrabass/double bass. Finale is much harder to work with VSTs in that most real DAWs, as it isn't designed for playback but rather scoring and orchestrating.

I am glad you found the dissonance to be effective. I honestly love using dissonance whenever possible to create tension.

I really love that you took the time to judge each movement as its own section and thus focus on the flow of each movement. I do know the second is a little weaker than the rest (ironically, I wrote the second movement first and then decided it would make a better second movement and wrote a new first movement). I would have done more on the battle, but I didn't want to stretch out the material too long, as I was afraid the feeling of conflict would get lost if it kept going and going.

The third movement honestly should be longer, including the killing of Remus by Romulus and the killing/ascension to the heavens (depending on which legend you are familiar with) of Romulus. After my next piece, I might come back and revisit that third movement or perhaps even work on additional movements.

Thanks again for giving such detailed and constructive critique. I will definitely be working on more melody-based thematic music and trying to keep making things longer (For some reason, I seem to like writing short pieces much better, but there's no reason to not try).

[The Noble Cause (song)]

Hello there! I heard you wanted a review! Therefore, in the interest of bettering musicality...

DA GOOD:
-That intro is very nice.
-I very much like the instruments you've used, they have a quite realistic quality. What program did you use for this? If I remember right, you use Sibelious, correct?
-The overall tunes are quite good.

DA STUFF THAT COULD BE IMPROVED: (Since I assume you are not looking for mixing advice as much, I am going to point out more compositional issues for the most part)
-First of all, I agree with 'supaman321', the percussion was a bit too quiet. I understand if the crackles are unwanted, but mixing can generally help with that. Not sure if you can mix in Sibelious though - if that was what you were using, then I'm sorry. But honestly, the percussion was almost barely detectable. Not the pitched percussion, but the unpitched percussion.
-Also on the topic of percussion, there doesn't seem to be that much unhitched percussion, period - percussion, while not strictly necessary, is still an important part of orchestral music, and if you're using an entire orchestra, try to give the percussion players something to do. One thing I'd suggest is trying to pretend that you're actually writing for a real orchestra (if you aren't already). Think of each player, you don't want them to get bored. ;)
-I notice that there doesn't seem to be a specific 'theme' for the tune. One part of music is that it should have some kind of theme to latch onto - as it is, this piece kind of just... goes. WIthout a theme, songs generally are more 'rambling'. There does seem to be more of a theme for the first minute and a half, but after that, it just... goes kaplooey.
-The transition at about 1:45 seems a tad off and sounds pretty ad-libbed, I think it could be refined and improved a little bit. I HIGHLY suggest using some more cymbal rolls. You aren't that bad in this regard (unlike Step), you can squeeze a few more in there.

OVERALL DIAGNOSIS:
Dude. You are talented. I really, really would like to see you learning a little bit more composition, getting a slightly better program to make music with (like Step - FL Studio + EWQL instruments works great), and just a little bit more attention to detail in general, because you could quite easily be one of the best musicians on NG. :)

...and actually about this song rather than you - it's great. Could use slightly better instruments, though they are definitely very high quality. As I said, it could use a bit more percussion and a slightly more consistent 'theme', but those are relatively minor quibbles. Good work!

Hope this was helpful!

-Swint-

-Review Request Club-

samulis responds:

Wow! Thanks a ton for this excellent review! You give a lot of great comments that will certainly help me improve with future works... each piece is yet another step closer to quality music.

First, to address my setup- I use Finale 2009c (rather outdated indeed, but an industry standard in the eyes of composers who write for players) with EWQL Symphonic Orchestra Gold and a few other EWQL packs I have acquired over the years. Eventually I hope to move to a program which is more of a DAW, as Finale is limited in its ability to create a good virtual performance.

On the subject of themes and motifs, I honestly should stick to those more, but my musical style tends to ramble a lot naturally and I find using only a single theme very boring, even when thrown every which way to make a piece longer. Perhaps one of these days I will stand back and plan out a piece using motifs and exactingly direct it before I even put down a note, but for now, I like letting my muse guide me to the finale, wherever it may be.

If you are interested in motifs in this piece, there is one key motif. You can hear it introduced by the flute in the beginning, and it is further elaborated when the horns and trombones bear the melody after a B section (~30-~1:00) and a short transition phase (~1:00-~1:10). A period of thematic motion leads to the finale (~2:10).

I really used to use percussion much more, but I have toned back in recent times. I am not sure why... I honestly should try to use percussion more.

I don't know a ton about composition aside from what I have learned in Theory I and II and my own personal study (through writing dozens of pieces and analyzing many great works). I do plan to go to college for music composition, more specifically perhaps film scoring or such if possible.

Thank you for your AWESOME review, If you have a classical(ish) piece you'd like me to review in return as a thanks, just send me a message!
-Samulis